Forks

OK. they're very nice people. But THEY ARE ALREADY DRIVING ME CRAZY. The politeness is KILLING me.
This evening we were teaching them how to use a fork and a knife and, when we told the nephew to use his fork he said to me, "I think...many people stab their tongues with this."
I pointed out that, west of China, from Russia through to England and into Canada. the US, Mexico and all of South America, we use forks and I've never heard of an auto-stabbing accident involving forks.
"But...I think those are wooden forks..." he says.